Vanity-The Mystery of Sin

                                                                     

"We have comraded long together, and it has been pleasant - pleasant for both; but I must go now, and we shall not see each other any more."
"In this life, Satan, but in another? We shall meet in another, surely?"
Then, all tranquilly and soberly, he made the strange answer, "There is no other."

                                                                                   

The Mysterious Stranger

Mark Twain

Have you ever wondered why we always imagine things to happen the way we want and expect,by constantly overlooking,that it is a whole circle we were put in with all risings and falls,whirls and flows,thunders and silence,with tweets and cries,yearning and suffering,love and hate,beauty and horrors,heaven and hell...we must adjust ourselves to different way of seeing things.

I know,at least once in your life you hoped for a prince or princess to come,a perfect beauty and personality, and then there walks in your life someone to pale in comparison to a fairy-tale character.The simplicity of life is knowing that the perfection is an overall view you have about yourself along with whole creation.The way i fight to overcome my own suspicions,fears,vices and lures,is strength i found in myself,faith that my endeavors will surpass all the sins and negativity,and let light unclear the mist and obscurity i was wrapped with.

I can't be sure if the presence of my friend will resolve mystery of the sin,but i know i feel myself safer and privileged while being accompanied by him.

-Where do we need to look for the source of our own vanity?
Is it heaven,mountain,cloud,or some particular thing we inherited...? or something else..?

Allegory of the Vanity of Earthly Things

-You just started running away from yourself,and within it lies first answer ....you need to take responsibility, not to blame someone or something else...it is always another being and thing..Look into yourself dear girl!

-Oh,it comes like first terrace..i myself in it,caught by own haughty attitude...so proud..

-An answer to all doubts ...whatever you do or receive,it is your deeds and thoughts..you decide whether to travel by a boat or luxurious ship,loaded with your own perspectives and hopes...sometimes it is a float you can set seal on and be happier.
Outer beauty is just a decoration,and true happiness comes from inside ..

-I still blame demon for my past misses.....

-Satan is only a reflection...all the negativity you hold in yourself,having amassed in your organism, brought him to you,and he occupied your body.He comes from another space and time,and whoever breaks the border between different realms,influences another's life.You can wonder now if you were the one to go behind our reality,or it was an invisible visitor in search for another's love and happiness.In the end Satan finds the weakness anyway...

-It is white angels i see..beautiful and illuminating,to fly toward us...(this time it is my vision),and i am free to share it with everyone.....you said to me that no one should be ashamed of own visions and dreams.It happened that one of them was abducted,and is a yearning angel now,to have lost the light and went into the underworld;from there he strives for easiness of human life,because there is not memory of previous luminosity
There are many to steal our happiness,love and beautiful memories;buried deeply underground,hidden from the light and real beauty,they try to live another's life....your weakness draws their attention ...Possession is the only way they have....

-From my experience,for i was possessed during a period of my life,i can confirm that it is so powerful to destroy someone's happiness.Bewitched and lost for the reality,i was wandering around aimlessly in a misty atmosphere,and the only track i had was a screamer to unveil some of mystery....
In my imagination i followed Codex Gigas ...a creature with little horns..

-Expectation is delusive....just live without any prejudices,let things happen,and go to meet them...don't bother yourself with suspicions or difficulty of your venture,feel it like a new journey,a nice holiday.
One should never be caught in a dominant shape of life....but it is easier for most people not to think too much.

-So i should be quiet and not afraid of demon..

-Don't show fear ...courage dispels all the negativity and changes one's life

-It is hard to confess,but it seems to me that i was the only one to call on him...i was striving for something greater beyond my reach,wanted to change the world,and the strength of my will invoked an invisible creature,or perhaps just energy.....power of mind is unmeasurable ..maybe i was inpatient,needed to wait some things to happen,and so i was punished.It brought me back to my youngest years when i was full of arrogance,but then again i can't blame myself too much...it is Youth...plenty of zest but low wisdom

The fall of the Rebel Angels

-It is certainly that everyone is prone to glorify himself more than he deserves ..there is much greater lesson to learn,about having respect for every being regardless of their differences,being good or bad,successful or poor..regardless of which part of the world he comes from.Strange though it may seem,don't judge yourself too strong;there are inevitable forces to follow you.If you presume that,then your life could be truest one and the only you have....going after greatest challenges is changing own destiny and interpretation of divine projection!
you was brave as everyone who follow their dreams and aspirations..

-Even Jesus Christ,was doomed..!The son of God was not able to avoid cruel fate.!

-He escaped Devil,but there were people all the same.... it was a man to stop transcending humanity ..Blame people!After all,we have legacy,his teaching and promise,that there will be a day when all people's dreams come true..it is great hope and inspiration and we all need them most!

I liked these words of my friend.
.-Hopes and inspirations!They gave the birth to everything!
Once there was a small hope to burst and turn itself into majestic universe!
Give me hope,and i shall love myself all day and all through the night
Give me hope,and i shall dive in the restlessness of the morning
Give me hope,and i shall find you in my dreams again!
Give me hope,and i shall bring our love to life!

We are all relics...we recycle ourselves together with space..there is nothing in the cosmos that is not being renewed!Our souls dwell together with dust of gold,and lose themselves in chasing of scrolling dreams beyond the sight;they feel your beats and meet your desires.So let yourself live in fantasy and alive hope ..and you know, looking for happiness begins among dreams and reality!Choose to be the one amid the stars,surrounded with glorious and sparkling spectrum of uncovered realms.There is no beauty in ordinary things....unless you change the way you look at them.

As i began my story,i intended to tell another one.. ...
-You can't release yourself from thinking  that everything happens the way you imagine....pure Vanity!Bow before the grace of universe ......it is not only about choice but also about being chosen..you have chosen for something..and be happy!


Paintings
Allegory of the Vanity
of Earthly Things
1630
Unknown French Master

The Fall of the Rebel Angels
1666
by Luca Giordano

Luca Giordano
Luca Giordano (18 October 1634 – 3 January 1705) was an Italian late Baroque painter and printmaker in etching. Fluent and decorative, he worked successfully in Naples and Rome, Florence and Venice, before spending a decade in Spain.


Satan

Satan (Hebrew: הַשָּׂטָן ha-Satan), "the opposer",[1] is the title of various entities, both human and divine, who challenge the faith of humans in the Hebrew Bible.[2] In Christianity the title became a personal name, and "Satan" changed from an accuser appointed by God to test men's faith to the chief of the rebellious fallen angels ("the devil" in Christianity, "Shaitan" in Arabic, the term used by Arab Christians and Muslims).[3] In Islam, a shayṭān is any evil creature, whether human, animal or spirit. With the definite article, the Shayṭān is Iblis, the Devil./wikipedia


Lucifer

Traditionally, Lucifer ( /ˈluːsɪfər/ or /ljuːsɪfər/) is a name that in English generally refers to the Devil or Satan, especially in reference to his status as a fallen angel.

In Latin, from which the English word is derived, Lucifer (as a noun) means "light-bearer" (from the words lucem ferre). It was the name given to the Morning Star, i.e. the planet Venus when seen at dawn.

Vatican Archive

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that the Church regards the Devil as being created as a good angel by God, and by his and his fellow fallen angels choice fell out of God's grace.

Sin is present in human history; any attempt to ignore it or to give this dark reality other names would be futile. To try to understand what sin is, one must first recognize the profound relation of man to God, for only in this relationship is the evil of sin unmasked in its true identity as humanity's rejection of God and opposition to him, even as it continues to weigh heavy on human life and history.

Vanity
 excessive pride in or admiration of one’s own appearance or achievements:

 it flattered his vanity to think I was in love with him

Origin:Middle English: from Old French vanite, from Latin vanitas, from vanus 'empty' (see vain)

Whispers of Childhood

WIZARD and ME


ME:Will you take me to a short journey into my childhood days?

WIZARD:Why do you want to go back?

ME:I wish i could see myself as a little girl

WIZARD:It is easy,just put your imagination in move or look at a picture of your childhood

ME:But i wish to rediscover some secrets from the time i was just a child.

WIZARD:I knew that you didn't tell me the truth

ME:Maybe i was afraid of other people's reaction

WIZARD:There is a big difference between the two worlds-Childhood and Maturity ;
to feel and experience your youngest days you need to live another time again

ME:I need it right now,for i write a story

WIZARD:I shall give you a glimpse into past times,and nothing more..perhaps you will
find a little nook for me on your pages..to keep me from being forgotten;you see,
i live in one's memory,from century to century people pass their testimonies
and keep me alive.....if there were no reminiscence i would die..

ME:It sounds like recall of a fire that people once kept burning ....

WIZARD:Only it is about LIGHT now..good memories light up the future,

but bad ones bring calamity and misery;every time a man lights up a path,
we all step into bright days;each time one starts a war it brings us back into
the darkness...it is not easy to get out of the HELL..

I am sure even there was a visitor to darken and puzzle my childhood,
i would bring about but pure brightness for you and me....Thank you my dear WIZARD!

WIZARD:Good luck with your endeavors and aspirations,there is a reward for everyone who
is able to revive their youth....and that is great SECRET!should i reopen it for You,it takes from
you to make a new path for others who are brave enough just like you are,,.Will you?,,
..anyway with no special promise i shall tell you it,because i know that you already
reigned a secret ..You won old age...so every time you make a path for another one,
you are granted with the sparkle of eternal Youth....
The more starry paths you open the greater and more beautiful your Youth....

I smiled,said nothing but was sure that my wizard knew the whole truth for me and of me...and i knew without  even saying a word to me,that there was a hidden danger to stop me from achieving all my dreams,i knew for myself which one i still longed for...

When i waked up that morning,nothing was the same as previous days;i felt like being suddenly touched by smell of some olden and rushing times,as came out from crumpled and burnt pages of a book to have stayed too long exposed to Sun's merciless rays.Particles of dust floated and soared high above my head,while walking on a unsightly path remembering me of some colored and lost time,and as every child being eager to feed own curiosity i looked to the right and left with hope to notice some recognizable objects,or signs to lead me into the course of unveiling my dreams.

As i was walking along the trail,all the colors changed their robes in a desperate call on me to replace them with new ones to refresh my memory and clarify sights around me.I recognized an aged tree of apricot to bear delicious fruits,then there was a tall and robust mulberry,a place to spend few hours in meditation,by sitting high on its hidden branches.Who doesn't like abundance of mellow purple and pink fruits?Can you imagine the simplicity of a moment,when you feel like a Queen while dangling legs in empty space bellow,to rise few meters from the ground!What would many of us give for such a pleasure and magic of the moment?
I hardly was aware how that lovely tree held me in its hug by trying to pass on me its own pains and hopes.. ...how many times i am unconscious about another man's griefs and expectations?For the all is live in my magic land,and every thing,every creature has personal story to tell us.

Whether life still exist,or i am a slender breeze in obscurity,just a faded copy of gloriousness that i was granted with,in a time to have gone.That is which makes me doubt in reality of my life,when everything seems so dummy,with people around me seemingly walk,talk and make other gesticulations,but the pulse of life has vanished or made into something resembling a realm where the prince of darkness potters and makes his dirty mischiefs.I constantly lose myself in that labyrinth of pale perceptions and an account of intensive feelings in my first views of life around.

There was a river,and still she makes her appearance while running by my village house,only the stories are different since the time i had some lovely days in her company.When i return there and look into its surface i see how the warmth and excitement of those early moments have complete fled,while vainly longing to bring back vividness and hilarity of past enjoyment;and i know i can only revive memories starring into a framed picture to hang on my room's wall.
Oh, how passionately i wish i were again in primary layout of my picture,abandoned there and free of time's measurements and changes,inevitably followed by the flow of passing years!From my distance now,i see these visions colored in gold and silver,as reflections of vivid and colorful vibrations they were once.
I looked for more haunted places that used to catch my attention and love;one of them found its place in the hills up my village where my grandma and granddad grew vine and meadow,patterned with tress of plumes,pears and apples.In the early Spring,it found me happy with lovely wild strawberries i picked and enjoyed in their scent.And they still occupy the same stretch;i can walk among them and enjoy in scenery,but can't feel previous alluring and marry impressions,except in my memory.The trees,strawberries and meadow rest now in their tawny and blanch decor.
The scenery stood the same but I am the one to be changed because the lucidity and sensibility of child's eye has gone forever.I don't say that my childish spirit abandoned the nest without leaving its fluffs to keep tracks and enriched me in these decrepit times..
Hence i feel that the all was someone's hoax,to let we go through life toward its supposed end,to grow,but persistently losing the glow and sparkles of life's pleasure and happiness.Somehow our basic picture got spoiled,and like anyone trying to recover a masterpiece,would only find themselves to never make anything better or return its beauty and purity given by first colors,painted with the precious moves of a brush.
What grows fantastic in this story,if you happen not to conceive it,is the sense of time's illusion and fascination.;that little child with personal memories and experience seems to me like coming from primeval times,and containing all the wisdom of life.
I see that child in hold of pristine wisdom written by invisible visitors and unknown by God,while a rapacious hand of foxy Devil seized a slice to allure and deceive ones who are brave to search for sacred knowledge.I assume it comes to us in flash of light traveling a distance between remote star and find its sprout here on earth.
My musing over past times,made me lose sense of reality ....where is beginning?where is the end?Did i go into right direction?What if the very beginning of my life was my greatest achievement,being but a pure divination.That child makes me upset to suspect in my present,my judgment and reason,to wonder myself who knew more and lived real life.Me or that child?It makes me feel living an untrue life,in which we mostly become lost in reaching true love,in learning,enjoying and celebrating the life itself.Being caught in an emptiness while trying to get to the top i climb all the time,i slide further and further into the deep,stuck in the frivolity and frost on the bottom.Such a condition makes i lose my reason,doubt my mind,cognition and observation,by suspecting myself about where is the mistake;and if there was any,whether it had to imply in my life or i made a choice once.


Still there is hope for all of us to walk on the tracks of childhood's glistening paths...
What You really need to learn is simplicity of FIRST STEPS a baby learns .!Make first steps,dare to walk,and everything will come to be as it was divined and drawn by one's hand to paint your canvas of life.Start anything,no need for a bulk of designs and plans ,just let your leg make one STEP and all the rest will unroll as it was predicted.That is the wisdom which the child i used to be told me in whispers,by slowing their sounds over the years to pass by,and like music forgotten but learned once,they might be refreshed in memory to teach us again about life,unwrapping the picture of FIRST STEPS in the earliest childhood!
Remote sounds and notes,smothering WHISPERS from past times,are still able to bring back to us first and inborn KNOWLEDGE from our ancestors,left in heritage,the road of which ,we can only find in FIRST CHILD IMPRESSIONS!
That is,as i see it clear now,why i kept in my mind that child as being AGED one, in my vision!The child showed pristine WISDOM leading through unawareness and subconsciousness of a naive and genuine being to just make first steps in life,more a reflection passed on us from first beings once walked on the Earth!

Illustration
my free creation









 

Love has come down from Heaven

"In a ghostly hour i lost my love'
O, sweet illusion,bring me another one,
The price is small for a bit of my happiness;
I won't steal or lend,
You have my permission to make a cheat on me,
For i am but a lonely servant of yours,
Be you from heaven or the hell
In a ghostly hour i lost my love.
It doesn't matter any more to me,
As i sold my soul once ago;
And the only hope i have now,
Is that glowing span
While being in the full sense of myself,
Agreed to have a crumb of your glorious mercy!

                                                                                                    

Since my birth,love has been an inevitable companion of my every day's life while i never assented to any ordinary consumption of her.Love is too powerful and magical to be just an usual visitor of many to travel across all planetary and starring worlds out there.From the very beginning,whether there was a fireball explosion,filled by pure particles of energy,carried here and there on the pallets of the sky,by making a whirl around planetary heads and spreading their hands eagerly into space,or taking a religious approach and thinking of God's will and power to make all things happen,i strong believe in the existence of catholic love to incorporate and unite all of us and everything together.
First thought was about Love,as soon as God wished for bringing into life a picture of man and woman to live together.In addition to God's command,there is a natural aspect of human need to love and be loved;it is perpetual aspiration to make every day a holiday.Being caught in mind hemisphere,love paves its path for beauty as another aspect of magical travelers.

The Stolen Kiss

First and main recognition of love is within ourselves
I love myself
I respect myself
I know myself
Primal presumption to live a healthy life is being in love with yourself.
There might be hours to torture ourselves with hate and looking for where its source comes from;some hints of possible scenario going back to an idea of rivalry to have conceived envy and hate.If we were to follow our thoughts,sometimes spiced with jealousy and odium,it would become clear that the hell's cradle rests in our minds.There is nothing to come out of us,which has not made its way through the splice of our thoughts.
The most famous sprout coming from the darkness,is Satan.I don't know if you ever felt his presence and what your impressions would look like,but i believe,my own encounter might be a good illustration.Being obsessed,appears to be an exceptional experience,from a point of view;from the other one,it is really the "Hell".He doesn't allow to live in love,and being a great opponent of your happiness,his desire is you never meet and reunite with your lover.Once deprived of love,with mangled feelings and without home,Satan was condemned to live as vagabond for all the times.
Thereby if you are alone and no one holds your hand,,think of the past when someone earned this fatal destiny for you.As i rout over my past lives while pulling drapery to the left and right of my view,i can see,for a moment,the face of my previous life and colors to paint my being.It is black and white like dress of a sinful nun who never paid ransom for her sins.For what one could think different about something to constantly escape from their possession,unless there was a great sin to seal their fate.

Soon as self-willed Eva,made her own way in picking an apple from the tree of knowledge of good and evil,by leaving Adam in ignorance,and making an act of cheating,LOVE became an ILLUSION for ever.....only true Love survives in heaven's cradle...
True lovers are damned to long for each other forever and stand their passion drifts through endless cosmic expanse;fortunately enough,some of them might win just one day of real earthly love..and they should consider themselves happy for such a mercy...
And i know,i already lived through my blessed moment in life,had a glimpse of happiness by knowing great love...now i can only watch its petals scattered high in the air,like a seducing and beautiful flower being deprived by cruelty of a storm of its bloom,and condemned to grieve for its beauty forever..
You can have only one GREAT LOVE in life..all the rest are illusions..more or less...
By keeping that in your mind,you agree to a handful of little lies around your love;don't ask more than it is possible and don't undervalue what is sent to you..take it like a packet,wrapped with ribbons in colors that you don't like,and imagine how yellow one shines red or purple...change the colors in your mind and take them for the truth..how many times in life we come down to such sweet illusions?-almost every day as we breathe.

                                            In a ghostly hour i lost my love'
                                        O, sweet illusion,bring me another one,
                                      The price is small for a bit of my happiness;
                                                I won't steal or lend,
                                        You have my permission to make a cheat on me,
                                          For i am but a lonely servant of yours,
                                             Be you from heaven or the hell;
                                                In a ghostly hour i lost my love.
                                            It doesn't matter any more for me,
                                                 As i sold my soul once ago;
                                                And the only hope i have now,
                                                   Is that glowing span
                                        While being in the full sense of myself,
                                     Agreed to have a crumb of your glorious mercy!  


This little verse comes not from a dreamy mind to hold his pen in a rushed time but as lone echo of past lovers,whose souls travel through the time to find a glimpse of happiness when the renewed lovers in some another age meet each other,while pieces of their love warm lost souls once again...
I am not the lonely prisoner of his will.Many a lover found themselves in a character who rests in gold pages of a book.I myself recognize beautiful Margarita and her unrestrained youth,to be my reciprocal image coming right from the famous novel by Mikhail Bulgakov.
Margarita is the minion of both God and Devil,a noble privilege,and as such not available to everyone.Only a chosen few is allowed to meet astonishing creatures from the light and darkness and meet an exceptional destiny.Sometimes it is permission to break the limits to separate reality from magic,and like a wizard to join all mystical beings in holding of SECRETS ..sometimes,they are given too much and the same taken just in a wink,for the glory has its own price..
Margarita conquers both realms-light and darkness,by her love of Master and unusual young look she kept in her older years.
Where Devil draws his breaths,there must be something "marvelous" in air .......
I listen to him as whispers...i am deprived of Love,but have power to make your dreams come true..and being without feelings my reward will be your punishment alike!


 My dear demon,i know you,i received and embraced your award,and your "revenge".

 LOVE must be fed

Love revives its strength in your inspiration.Be focused on your hobby;your love of the nature gets its satisfaction in long walks along the forests' paths..go out and find solace with the birds in flight;having a nice garden is perfect rest to cherish beautiful flowers and make short breaks in meditation;love of books is my favorite,there is no greater enjoyment but holding some yellow pages to meet my curiosity and satisfy exploring spirit;put some of your thoughts on paper or transmit it to the screen.Love your work whatever to be,and wherever you are,and in the lack of passion,get it compensated by own talent to find some little pleasures around it,employ your imagination .....

There are many patterns of loves..wrap them with the ribbon in a matching color...
sometimes you give your love away with no strong pretension .....just an easy sympathy and affection
sometimes you love another being as close soul to answer your aspirations and inner beauty
sometimes it is only a hint of possible love..
sometimes it is destiny to take you to the other side of the world and prevent from meeting your love again..
sometimes it is great LOVE to be swallowed and prevented from realization by demon's power....


My LOVE is not being from this world,it aspires for and wanders among the souls fell from the height and doomed to suffer;my love will never reach its destination where faithful hearts meet each other again;my love is an unfinished story;she is not under God's grace;my love suffers some past sins and takes many centuries to fulfill itself;my love brought in a verdict of guilty on me and damned to enchant everyone but never to belong anyone.......




Painting
"The Stolen Kiss"
by Jean-Honore Fragonard